Tuesday, 25 January 2011

I am musing....

For Get Writing - a literary event taking place in Feb which I will be attending - I decided to investigate some of the authors who are going to be there (when I say investigate I don't mean stalking). One of the authors recently contributed to the VWC's blog space - Leigh Russell- and I heard she had a blog so decided to read it and I was quite surprised by a particular post. (I recommend her blog btw)

Now at Blast, whenever someone finished a story, they said that it was a brilliant feeling; like they had really accomplished something. And don't get me wrong they had - it isn't easy to write a book when you're between the ages of 13-19. Most don't do it. It's rare someone does. Now, I was told after completing Blood Moon that I was the third person on there to finish a story of that length. Ok, am straying off the point here - what I was meant to say is that I know its an accomplishment. But when I finished Blood Moon I felt...nothing. Actually, I felt quite lost. I'd just finished something that had taken up seven months of my spare time doing...and now I had nothing to do.

On this post it mentioned something about it being an anti-climax (in the comments bit. I am nosy) and it never occurred to me before - finally something huge that I had undertaken was finished. It was done. Now I was left with what felt like...nothing. I had no new ideas. There was nothing screaming out to me to be written. I wrote one short story in that time (it wasn't brilliant) and I felt myself going a bit mad. My mind was demanding something to be written. Something to be created. It didn't matter what the hell it was, it just had to be something. And in a fit of madness or pure writing passion the poem Waiting was made. In I think about ten minutes. It was a long time after all.

For a few weeks after that, there really wasn't that much more that I wanted to write. I read the beginning of Blood Moon to the VWC - but it didn't feel right. My writing had changed enormously from when I had started. For better or worse am still not sure.

I was on a train to Brighton and was looking out the window. I noticed a station called Burgess Hill. It struck me then that it would be a really good name for a story. The idea followed a few weeks later. A notepad was bought (in Scotland, this was during the school holidays) and Burgess Hill was born. (For anyone who cares the surname of C is Inveroy - reference to Inveraray where the notepad was bought from) It wasn't the type of story that I am used to writing but it was different. That helped satisfy my need to write.

I tried out Burgess Hill on the Blastites. They seemed to like it. After a few weeks of gathering courage to read in front of the VWC (still do struggle with it. I blush every time I read. Highly embarrassing. I think my shyness is increased because a) they're all adults and b) they're all more experienced than me. They are lovely people though if a little intimidating) I read out the first bit of Burgess Hill. They seemed to like it.

I think I always will have a problem with my writing. I am one of those people who are never satisfied with their work. I always listen to the bad because I know that shows I have room for improvement.  However I tend to only listen to the bad, which I need to sort out.

Anywho I shall stop boring you all with this. And tell you something interesting. My muse today is an orange cat with purple polka dots on it. Cos that is how I roll. *puts sunglasses on*

Am resisting the urge to write anymore of Underdog. I need to get Burgess Hill part one done before I can start writing that. Even though at the moment it feels like my notepad is calling to me.

Take care me dears and I hope you're muses visit you all tonight and inspire you to do something wonderful.

Ellen xxx


  1. When you are satisfied with your writing, you will stop being self critical, and we all need to read our own work critically. It's hard to do, but it sounds like you are already self editing. Is any writer ever satisfied with what they've written? Is it ever 'perfect' ?
    I'm glad you liked my blog, btw. You're welcome to come and join in the discussion.

  2. Hello Leigh (is it alright for me to call you that or would you prefer Mrs Russell? I still very much have school manners drilled into me.)

    You are right - I am not sure whether writers are truly satisfied in their work. I guess we are always looking for ways to improve - that in its self is a good thing. As is looking at the good - knowing that you can write.

    Oh and your blog is brilliant. It won me over completely when I saw the picture of you and the two storm troopers. (I believe that is what they are called - please feel free to correct me!)

    Thanks so much for reading

    Ellen x